Why You’re Still Stuck: The Unconscious Belief Blocking Your Lasting Change

If you're asking yourself why you keep falling into the same painful pattern—despite reading all the books, taking the courses, and putting in the effort—I get it. Take a beat, and let's chat.

First off, it’s not your fault.

You are self-aware, you are a powerful go-getter, and you’ve worked hard to make a lasting change. But you keep falling into the cycle: you make a shift, feel proud, then BAM, the pattern shows up again. This leaves you feeling frustrated and wondering, "What is wrong with me?"

I absolutely get it. After being diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 35, I accepted that my default belief is “what is wrong with me?” Because of this, working in alignment with the 90% of me is essential for me to be living life on my terms.

This work isn’t about being perfect and always being positive.I think that's actually what causes deep pain...not knowing how to hold all of who we were, are, and are becoming. When I first experienced the power of my unconscious mind, I felt empowered that I could have such influence over how I treat myself, which in turn brought even more ease and joy into my life.

Over the last decade, the inner work has evolved. I am honored to be leading the way, helping myself, my family, and my community understand how to be in connection with your unconscious mind while also being human. Two things can be true at the same time.

So, if you have been feeling stuck and can’t figure out why you keep ending up glued to the problem like 1970’s wallpaper, keep reading. The rapport I have with my unconscious mind has transformed my life.

For example, when my marriage is feeling stuck, we use the framework and move ourselves through the problem with respect and honor—sometimes in a matter of minutes, sometimes longer. The goal is to understand the root of the problem so we can apply the tools and keep moving forward with love, connection, and peace.

We didn’t have a communication problem. We had our own limiting beliefs running in the background and were playing them out with one another trying to solve it with our conscious mind.

We've been taught to fix everything with our "thinking brain," or what I call the Conscious Mind. But here's the breakdown of where real change happens:

The Conscious Mind is only 10% of your resources. Trying to make a lasting change with just 10% willpower is exhausting. It takes everything you have, and the moment life hits hard, your resources plummet.
Real, sustainable change happens in the other 90%—your Unconscious Mind. This is your holographic library. It's the part of you that runs your body and, crucially, stores every emotion and experience you’ve ever had. It codes this data into a core belief about what is safe, possible, or easy for you.

Your unconscious mind is running the show, and that core belief requires the 90% of you to resolve it. Knowing the "why" happens at the 10% and that’s why insight alone isn't enough to stop the cycle. Knowing why we were stuck in the same pattern in our marriage helped, but it didn’t solve the pattern. We were aware of it, but we both needed to do the inner work or the ME Method at the 90% so we could unlock the belief and emotions that were causing us to get caught up in the same loop. Without going deeper to understand what is fueling the pattern we spend all our time, money and energy managing the pattern instead of actually solving it.

Example: when I went back to work after being on my maternity leave I started to feel resentful for how much I was ‘doing'and how much I had to manage. I took the work and went deep to access the information at the 90% and I uncovered how uncomfortable I was with asking for help. The deep belief running was that I felt not good enough for not being able to manage everything. To say that out loud was uncomfortable, vulnerable and scary to admit that for the first time in my life, I couldn’t cope.

Admitting this to my partner felt all consuming, so consciously I was angry, resentful and occupied with managing all the things. After working through the ME Method I uncovered how powerless I felt about my current situation. I realized that it was never modeled to me how to work as a team, share, partner, communicate and share the load of being parents in a healthy way. So in my 90% belief system I didn’t realize there was an option of doing life any differently. However, because I wanted a healthy, loving, relationship and I did the ME Method on me first, I was able to recognize the pattern, see how it created limitations in the life I wanted to design and I chose to do my marriage communication differently.

I thought about what I wanted. Communicated with my husband what needed to shift and we worked together in coming up with new ways of managing our new family life. It’s not perfect, because life is always changing, but we worked through our emotions, processed them, and worked together on creating a new solution. A path I didn’t even know was possible if I hadn’t looked inside myself and went to the root.

For deep, sustainable transformation, we must access the root of the pattern so we can:

'Recode' the core belief with new, life-affirming information.
Realign your nervous system, soul, and heart.

This process creates total mind, body, and soul alignment. You no longer have to think about making a change, you have now embodied the change. This is how we build new neural pathways, giving your body a brand new, effortless path to think, move, and believe from.

This isn't about reliving trauma; it's about clearing the emotional code attached to an old experience. You deserve to program your beliefs for peace, confidence, freedom, and abundance.

Ready to stop managing the pattern and actually resolve your core beliefs?

Join my free masterclass, Why You’re Still Stuck (And It’s Not Because You Haven’t Tried Hard Enough). We’re talking about root-level healing, safety, and alignment to create lasting change.

Save Your Spot: February 12 at 11:00am

https://www.nicoleweston.ca/masterclass

With love Nicole Weston

Life Coach & QCP™ Practitioner | Founder of Can’t Call Your Mom Podcast